This is going to be fairly lengthy, but here is my situation. I am a person who is full of ambition. I am always on the look out for ways to improve my life and the life of my four year old son. This has been exceedingly difficult after my marriage failed and my ex left me for another woman (this was the second time he did this). Since our separation in September of 2007, he barely takes the time to see his son and even has the nerve to put his girlfriend and involving himself in local theatre before him. This has caused so many arguments and threats to take him to court. He has also done things that were reckless involving our son including showing up for a visit three hours late drunk and stating he "forgot" that it was a co-worker's birthday that night (he never even bothered to call to say he was going to be late or wasn't coming). He also left me home alone with our son three days after an operation and on Vicodin for the pain to meet up with his girlfriend (while we were still together). I was unable to get out of bed when he woke up in the middle of the night crying, nor could I pick him up as I couldn't lift over 20 pounds. He has also requested moving his visitation day from Wednesday, because his girlfriend has off on Wednesday nights and he'd like to spend the time with her. Most recently, after I took our son on a three week vacation to Ohio, I asked my ex if he would be taking our son on a vacation this year. His answer was "probably not, because (he) wants to take (insert girlfriend's name) somewhere nice for vacation". This is just naming a few instances. With that bit of background in mind, I can go into my question. Almost a year ago, I started seeing someone. This happened very unexpectedly, but I'm glad it happened. He has really encouraged me to find better for my son and I. This something better is something that I cannot give us where I am at. This eventually lead to my decision to relocate to Northwestern Ohio, where my boyfriend resides. I am currently living in southeastern Pennsylvania, near Philadelphia. My decision was finalized when I lost my job back in April. I have been searching for work since January, since I wanted to get away from the place I was at, and have found nothing. I may end up losing my apartment, because they may take a look at my income and see that I am currently depending on unemployment and child support. Unemployment runs out eventually, and child support would only cover my rent. They'll view it as my being unable to afford this place. The cost of living in my area is VERY high. Over in Ohio, I've been able to find work at the pay rate that I was receiving at my previous job. The cost of living is also lower, which would allow me to be able to afford a place to live and all living expenses. The crime rate is also significantly lower, and the school district we are looking into is above average in testing. I know the schools in my area are blue ribbon schools, however from experience, I can say that a blue ribbon does not make the school a good school to attend. I have been doing extensive research on relocation and child custody, and I am making lists of reasons why this would help improve quality of life for my son and myself. Mind you, the boyfriend being there is a minimal factor, as we probably won't even be living together right away. He wants to finish his schooling, and I want to be more established there before we take that step. Since the day I found out I was pregnant, I have ALWAYS had my son's best interests at heart. I have done everything in my power to make sure he lives a happy and healthy life. Do I think he'll be better off without his father? No. I want him to have a relationship with him, but at the same time-given where that man's priorities are-our son would not be better off living with him for the aforementioned reasons. I have proposed a realistic custody arrangement which would allow him to see our son more than he does now, and I have offered to compensate for the cost of travel. I know it's a seven hour drive and it's still a hike even though I've offered to meet half way once a month and fly out with him once a month, but it is still a very realistic agreement. I would also allow him to take him for the summer, if he's willing to take that time to spend with his son. I also said I would waive child support for that duration, since he would obviously be able to support him with him visiting over there. Holidays would be alternating and would also be decided upon school schedules when he starts in fall of 2010. My question is, what can I do to be able to win this case? My ex is fighting it, and the reasons he has given really make me question his reasons behind fighting. He has said he wants to be there if our son is sick, yet regardless of having time off when I didn't, he never took off to take care of him...I did. He has mentioned the fact that I didn't up and move to England to be with him when we were deci
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Ok .. so chart and document the things you have said here with reguard to his habbits and lack of planning with his son. Visitation is an issue courts deal with daily .. in short the court can't force you to stay where you have no employment and no place to live. You may wish to suggest or confirm you have a job where you are moving to . . .hint hint. The when and where for visitation can be worked out but ... get a lawyer .. make is very clear and concise ..... Good Luck.
